A year back, I had what most would describe as a breakdown. I ran out of juice and had too many balls up in the air at once. I can talk about it easily, because I had an amazing doctor who listened to me with genuine concern and the most supportive and patient wife.

Then I found someone that would take my money each week, in return for my demons (and we would make that exchange in a nice rural setting over a cup of tea). I took the usual pills prescribed to take the edge off and had a go at trying to create the headspace I needed, which was the hardest part.

It’s not unique at all. Most of us, creatives especially, can’t see what’s coming to take us down, until it’s too late.

Getting through what I did, is something I’m proud of. I’m altered. I’m more protective of my time and the spaces in my mind. I care little for people and things that used to cause me sleepless nights and my friendships are fewer, but I believe are deeper than before.

Twisted50 came along at the right time, because I had a story in my head that I wanted to refine and share. I was challenged  by you all to be Twisted and I had that in abundance. The challenge itself was intensified by the thought that my work would be reviewed by other writers and those in the higher echelons of the industry.

Writing is an elixir and I had missed it whilst busying myself at work (and therapy).

My story, Bloated, is about underestimating someone. It is about making assumptions and realising, too late, when you’re wrong. My story is about the unexpected and it is truly depraved; written in my most natural style, which I think is captured nicely in a short story.

To think that one year ago I was tumbling down and today I have one of my works featured in a book like Twisted50 is remarkable.

I have been lucky to write with people who are ‘on the up’ in the writing world and enjoying huge success. I like to think that Twisted50 will be the first step towards my own and as I finish this blog post, I will get back to work on my first novel The Ever Winter. 10k words left. Give or take. In the end, I’m glad that I kept some of my demons.

I hope you like Bloated, but if you don’t, there are forty-nine other stories to enjoy.

Penegrin Shaw

My Profile HERE

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